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Sunday, December 25, 2011
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Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Ideas For Headstone Inscriptions
For those who intend to be buried and not cremated, there are a variety of ideas for headstone inscriptions available. Headstone inscriptions have been around since headstones have been in existence. Selecting an inscription for a headstone is a personal decision that often finalizes the burial of a loved one. The amount of words written for a headstone inscription can vary from something very simple to a more elaborate type of poetry.
The length of words you write will also depend on your budget and cost factor. By default, headstone inscriptions have a name, date of birth through date of death. The bereaved family members decide if additional wording is desired. For some, added inscriptions are warranted and are willing to incur the additional expense.
Some ideas for headstone inscriptions may include any of the following:
Address the relationship to the living survivors (i.e., mother, father, son, or daughter) A selected scripture verse or excerpt An excerpt from a poem, saying or quote
Headstones today are made of marble or granite for long term durability. Often you can choose the font face but it will depend on the cemetery restrictions or rules. It's best to check with them before solidifying the headstone inscription.
There are many simple inscriptions to choose from that include 3-5 words like "In Memory of" or Rest in Peace". You can also choose to be more descriptive and place a short scripture verse from Psalm 23 such as "Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me, All the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the Lord, forever."
Other ideas for headstone inscriptions that are different can be a phrase from a song lyric, quotes from people, books, or movies, riddles, or a descriptive phrase about the deceased.
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Tuesday, December 13, 2011
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Thursday, December 8, 2011
Memorial Death Sayings
Memorial death sayings are appropriate to place in a funeral or memorial program as well as incorporate it into a short reading. They can be short thought provoking quotes or sayings about life and death that prompt the listener to reflect upon its words and meaning.
These types of saying can even be place on the tombstone of the deceased, if applicable but more often, people use them as short inclusions for the funeral or memorial programs, within a eulogy or memorial reading.
One of the most popular memorial death sayings comes from the Bible's Old Testament in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. It talks about a time for all things in our world and eludes to different seasons in our life. There was even an old 70's song written about this verse called "Turn, Turn, Turn (to Everything there is a Season)" which was originally performed by The Byrds.
Emily Dickinson was an American poet and lived in the 19th century. She has written many memorial death sayings that are noteworthy for a memorial service. You may find many additional death sayings from a variety of resources such as Socrates to Chinese wisdom to Biblical verses.
An example of a memorial death saying would be a sentence such as "All of life is a dream walking, all of death is a going home" which is taken from a Chinese proverb. There are also quotes and other proverbs from the Bible, Budda, and Zen.
Memorial death sayings can indeed also be a proverb. What is a proverb? It is a short sentence based on long experience. Most express some basic truth or practical concept and are considered to be a short saying.
Sigmund Freud also noted a saying about death in that "The goal of all life is death." Often memorial sayings or quotes are found on cards or even magnetic keepsakes. They are meant to give the reader a sentence which is full of meaning and something one can meditate upon and try to understand on a deeper or more profound level.
Basically any quote that talks or relates about death or dying can be considered a memorial death saying. If it contains something inspirational for the reader then the saying has successfully driven its point.
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Monday, December 5, 2011
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Thursday, December 1, 2011
Outlaws
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Dyin's Too Good For 'emThe most dangerous man is the one with nothing left to lose. When outlaws murdered your wife, and took your daughter, everything you had was gone. Your gut aches for blood and sweet revenge. Dyin's too good for 'em now.Ride back into the wild west as the gun-slinging Marshall James Anderson. You'll encounter a dusty town, an abandoned mine, a runaway train, and the orneriest cowpokes this side of the Mississippi as you uncover a twisted plot of greed and corruption.With weapons like your six-shooting .45, your .44 rifle, your 10-guage shotgun and your good ol' sawed off 12-guage, you'll be packin' plenty of fire power.Nothing warms the heart of a cold-blooded killer like hot lead. It's payback time.
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Monday, November 28, 2011
Building the Perfect Headstone For Your Loved One
Purchasing a headstone for a loved one who has recently passed can be a daunting task especially given the nature of this type of purchase and the lack of experience one may have. Where does one go to find more information about buying a headstone and designing one? Well look no further because herein lies the answers to these and more questions.
What Will the Cemetery Allow?
STOP! Before reading anything else, at least read this section before purchasing a headstone. You don't want to get stuck with a headstone the cemetery will not accept because the correct procedures were not followed.
Cemeteries typically regulate the kind of headstones or monuments allowed in their cemetery by a set of rules and regulations. It is within these rules that a cemetery will stipulate the particulars of the gravestone such as:
Type of grave headstone allowed - upright headstone, flat grave marker, bronze grave marker, cremation marker, etc. The size of the headstone - usually followed by the minimum and maximum sizes allowed Headstone coloring - granite colors allowed, bronze marker coloring Vase option - whether or not a vase is allowed and what type of materials are required
Additionally the cemetery may require a document to be submitted such as a 'Memorialization Authorization' form in which the lot owner authorizes the placement of a memorial headstone on the grave space. Once you know what the cemetery will allow you are ready to proceed to shopping around.
Types of Cemetery Headstones Available
There are many styles of headstones available, but they typically fall into a 4 major groups. Within these groups are several specific styles of grave headstones.
Upright headstones - This type of headstone consists of an upright monument tablet that rests on a base normally made of granite.
Slant markers - Shaped like a wedge with the narrow edge pointing upward, these markers can be purchased with or without a granite base that sets under the marker.
Flat grave markers - Usually made from granite or marble these set flush with the ground and are an economical choice because of their small size.
Flat bronze grave markers - Consisting of a bronze plaque mounted to a granite base (in most cases), bronze grave markers are required by many of the modern memorial park cemeteries in the country.
Finding the Best Headstone Prices
When shopping around for the best price on a cemetery headstone make sure you have the exact particulars for the headstone you want to by so you can compare apples with apples. You will want to have:
The size of the headstone and all of its components The granite color, example colors: Sunset Red, Dakota Mahogany, Georgia Gray, Barre Gray, etc. The finish of the headstone, example finish terms: Polish 2, polish 5, all steeled, balance rock pitch, penciled edges, etc. The design and exact lettering, if possible have a drawing of the design and layout you want for the headstone Any other particular items such as vases, a statue or a ceramic picture
Having these exact details will enable you to accurately compare prices between different companies.
Here are a few tips to consider when seeking the best price.
Cemeteries typically have the highest prices for grave headstones Monument dealers usually have the best selection and widest variety of offerings Internet retailers commonly have the best prices for headstones
Personalizing the Memorial Headstone
Once you have found the right dealer and type of headstone to buy, now comes the task of personalizing it with your loved one's information. Aside from the individual's name and life dates you may want to consider the following:
Headstone designs and artwork An epitaph for the headstone Emblems or symbols which will accent the headstone design Adding a ceramic portrait in the likeness of your loved one
Headstone Accessories
Some cemeteries allow accessories to be added to a headstone such as a ceramic picture or the addition of a flower vase. If the grave headstone is in a veteran's section the cemetery may allow a flag holder which will accommodate a small American flag. Still some may accept a bronze, granite or marble statue to accent the headstone.
In closing, make sure to do your homework and don't rush to get a cemetery headstone in place just for the sake of marking the grave. You can take your time and educate yourself so when it comes time to shopping around you will have a good chance at getting the best value for your purchase.
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Friday, November 25, 2011
Women with Dog Watch Dramatic Sunset over Tombstone National Park Photographic Poster Print by Paul Nicklen, 24x32
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Women with Dog Watch Dramatic Sunset over Tombstone National Park is digitally printed on archival photographic paper resulting in vivid, pure color and exceptional detail that is suitable for any museum or gallery display. Finding that perfect piece to match your interest and style is easy and within your budget!
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Ghouls, Gremlins, and Other Scary Things - Preparing for Halloween
In our family we don't celebrate Halloween. We do however LOVE pretend play and dressing up. Dramatic play is an everyday activity for us, not just one relegated to Halloween. However, it's October and in the US that is practically synonymous with Halloween. Inevitably the jack-o-lanterns, trick-or-treat bags and Halloween decorations are everywhere we go. Fake cobwebs, skeletons and tombstones are decorating our neighbor's front yard. In our favorite store, there is a princess costume hanging in the store window, but there is also a witch and a mummy hanging beside it. So whether we celebrate it or not, Halloween is a part of our lives, at least for this month, which means preparing my kids for the not-so-fun side of Halloween.
Don't get me wrong, Halloween can have its amusing side: the cute ladybug costumes, the glittery face paint, and the CHOCOLATE CANDIES... Hooray!
But, Halloween also has its dark and scary side: the vampires, gore and guts, spider webs and graveyards. Unfortunately, more often than not, in the media and in neighborhood, the spooky, ghoulish side wins out. The commercials for Fright Nights, Spook-fests and Haunted House tours far outnumber the ones for happy apple-bobbing, pumpkin-picking, hay-riding fall festivals. More often than not the neighborhoods are decorated with haunted house themes and not cheery autumn harvest themes. Furthermore, people do on Halloween what is usually against the rules: take candy from strangers, purposefully try to scare one another, revel in blood and gore, etc.
Young children can be highly frightened of Halloween, in which the ordinary people and places in their lives suddenly look nothing like they are supposed to. When friends and trusted adults are now dressed as characters they are unfamiliar with, and houses and stores they normally visit are now decorated as dark and foreboding places, just saying: "Don't worry, it is all pretend." or "It's okay, it's not real." doesn't pacify their apprehension. This is because when children play pretend or dress up during dramatic play, they often assume the roles that they are dressed as. They take on that character and often believe themselves to be that character, acting and feeling as though they were "the construction worker", or "the mommy", or "the doctor". So naturally Halloween seems real enough to them and that's all that matters.
Even if you don't celebrate Halloween with your child, or if you plan to indulge in friendlier, Happy Harvest type events instead, unless you plan to stay indoors for all of October, you and your little one will more than likely encounter some of the darker aspects of Halloween along your way. Therefore, it is important to prepare your child for Halloween's scarier aspects. Here are some tips to help prepare for the darker side of Halloween with your child:
1. In ordinary situations, long before Halloween, talk about what it means to feel scared. Often children do not have the words to associate with their feelings, nor the means to verbally express them. When you notice a strong feeling in your child, comment on their actions and the feeling that they are having. Saying comments like, "Oh, I noticed you are crying; you must be sad." or "I noticed you are stomping around, you must be mad." helps you child to connect the word for their feelings with their emotions and their actions. Before Halloween rolls around, when you notice your child is frightened of something, talk about what reactions you noticed and label that feeling. Talk about what things your child finds scary and why. For example, if your child is afraid of the dark what specifically about it makes her afraid? Is it because she can't find her way to the bathroom in a dark hall? Because the shadows are shaped like animals? Because she bumps into things in the dark? If your child is afraid of bugs, is it because he doesn't like how they look? Because they move too quickly and run across the ground? Is it because they feel slimy? Talking through not only what is scary but why something is scary helps to make the feared item less emotionally charged and more thoughtful and processed.
2. Tell your child one thing that you find scary and why. You should be genuine, and yet selective so as not to induce fear for your child. Pick something that isn't likely to bring up a new fear, something distant and not likely to be present or to occur, but something nevertheless real to you. For example, bungee jumping. I am very afraid of bungee jumping. It is too high, too fast, and just doesn't seem safe. I could genuinely talk about that fear without really inducing a new fear for my child, because bungee jumping is definitely not something in our future! Or I could say I am afraid of field mice. Pet mice in the pet store not scary, but wild mice, very scary. They are ugly and germy and move too fast and are hard to catch. Field mice are not likely in our future as we live in the city so this wouldn't likely arouse a new fear in my child. I would not however talk about my fear of losing my mom as this not something I can determine when it will occur and it may very well bring up the fear for my own child. Though you should be selective in picking your one fear to share, it is important that your child knows that being scared is something that happens to everyone.
3. Next, talk about strategies your child can use when he/she feels scared. Frightening things are less scary when you have a plan of action of how to deal with them. Taking control over a frightening situation makes it less scary and overwhelming. Before Halloween arrives, place the power of dealing with the feeling of fear in your child's hands. Talk about what responses your child can have with non-Halloween related things that your child finds scary. For example, if your child is afraid of bugs and spots on in the backyard, what can your child do? Maybe spray the bug with a water gun, call Mom to capture the bug, or squash the bug. If your child is afraid of the dark, can he have a flashlight, a nightlight, glow in the dark stickers, etc.
4. Talk about what strategies that you personally use to stay calm and deal with your fears. I.e. I stay away from bungee jumping. And I'd immediately hire an exterminator if I should ever see a mouse. Avoidance is certainly a valid tactic to teach/model, and so is calling for help. However, other tactics like practice (i.e. for speaking in front of crowds), or adaptations, accommodations, distractions, etc. (i.e. playing music while in the elevator) should be modeled/taught as well.
5. After the foundation of identification of fear and dealing with fears has been laid, relate the above discussions to Halloween. State that people sometimes find it amusing to be scary or to challenge their fears on Halloween. Talk about why as well. I.e. it makes people feel brave to confront things they are usually afraid of i.e. witches, villains, etc. It makes people feel strong or powerful to look scary. Again, discussing why makes the situation less emotionally charged, more thoughtful, and more processed.
6. Talk about what your child can do if he/she becomes overwhelmed or scared of a costume or decoration. I.e. close his eyes. Turn away. Carry a security toy or blankie. Use a loud, strong voice and say, "Stop, I don't like this." Or request to go home or to another non-threatening location. It is important not to chastise your child for being afraid or for whatever method he/she chooses to use to deal with that fear.
7. You should have your back up plan in place too. Prepare beforehand what you will do if your child becomes afraid, i.e. offer a hug and kiss, help hide their eyes, take him to a quiet, non-frightening location to calm down, etc. and most importantly share your plan so that your child will know both his plan and yours are in place.
8. If you want to, you can talk about the difference between real and fantasy as part of your Halloween preparations, but don't get bogged down in this part. For young children, the line between truth and reality is very thin and porous. Often the things they pretend are as real and valid to them as the events that happened yesterday-sometimes even more "real" and more easily remembered, too. Therefore, getting locked in a battle of true or false isn't worth it. However, if you choose to discuss reality vs. fantasy, a helpful game to illustrate this point is the "mask on-mask off" game. Show your child your face, and say "See, it's mommy". Then partially cover your face, "See, still me." Next completely put a mask over your face say, "Still me under here." Finally remove it, say "See, still mommy. The mask doesn't change who I am, it only covers me." Sometimes even this game is too scary for a child who doesn't want to see their parent changed in any way. So first try the mask on-mask off game with a doll instead. Repeat the game with your child looking in the mirror, with other people, with other toys, etc. Then relate this game to people in their costumes and houses with their decorations. The costumes and decorations don't change who the people or places are; they are only covered up.
9. Finally, reading books about Halloween like Peek-a-Booo by Marie Torres Cimarusti or Clifford's First Halloween by Norman Bridwell can help to lessen any fears and illustrate the playful, pretend aspect of Halloween. Again, don't get too lost in a real-pretend debate. The most important thing is for your child to know what fear means and to have strategies in place to deal with it. Such skills are important for Halloween, and even beyond, that for life.
Hope this helps you and your little one.